A Baby Shower Dinosaur

A friend recently had a baby shower. We had it at a cafe in Clearfield and I had the most delicious hash browns with gravy and cheese and bacon and mushrooms, and scones, and lots of coffee, yum! And afterward we went to a yarn store, but I digress...

Anyway, her shower theme was dinosaurs, so along with the 10 burp rags I crocheted her (in two different colors: blue/white and green with pink/purple bits) I made her a stuffed dinosaur! Of course, I forgot to take pictures of the burp rags, but they weren't remarkable so it's not like I'd be showing off if you got to see a picture of them...

My friend came over and, in exchange for some spinning fiber, she sewed all the pieces up for me because she's such a good friend and I hate sewing. In fact, I will probably never make a stuffed toy again because not only do I hate sewing, but I've now made two dinosaurs, one knitted and one crocheted, and I didn't particularly enjoy making either of them.

Anyway, Scott said it was hideous but I thought it turned out kinda cute. Slightly wonky, but cute.

A Thank You! Scarf

Recently a dear friend finished knitting a pair of socks and was displeased with them...something about having to redo one of the legs and then the stripes didn't match. Anyway, since such things don't bother me at all, she gave them to me! They fit perfectly and they're pink and stripey and I love them so much!

As a Thank You!, I made her a scarf. First I spun the yarn:

100% BFL (Blue-Faced Leichester, a breed of sheep), 4 ounces.

Then I knitted the scarf out of it:

It's the scarf pattern the Yarn Harlot invented, the One Row Handspun Scarf. Usually I crochet scarves instead of knitting them because they work up a lot faster, but this time I decided to be adventurous and knit it, and, surprisingly, it only took two days. Granted, they were weekend days where all I did was sit around and knit, but still, two days is super fast for me!

Anyway, she LOVED it! She's been wearing it every time I've seen her since I gave it to her.

Birthday Cream Puffs!

Last night Kwiddens came over for our traditional birthday celebration: dinner and baking!

First we mixed up the dough and baked the cream puffs. Here is The Kwiddens making me some delicious puffs:



Next we cut their tops off and pulled their guts out:

Next, we mixed up the whipped cream (with melted marshmallows instead of sugar! and coffee). While that set up in the refrigerator we went out to dinner at Red Lobster. It was so delicious. Crab legs always are. And our waiter was kinda cute and flirted with us a bit, and it made us feel pretty awesome about ourselves.

Then we came home and put the whipped cream inside the cream puffs:

I haven't tasted them yet, but they're sitting in my fridge just waiting for me to get home from work!

I See The Light!

I pulled out my SAD light the day after my last post. I rigged it so it shines on me while I'm in the shower, then while I brush my teeth, etc. It's only been two days, but I already feel a little bit better. Of course, it could be because work is less stressful when all my equipment works properly (finally...), or it could be because it's Friday (woo!), or it could be that I got free lunch today and it was delicious, or it could even just be a placebo effect. Either way, I'm going to keep it up and hope it helps.

I should have pulled it out a few months ago, but I just didn't feel like I was that far down, until I realized the other day that I didn't want to knit. There's seriously something wrong if I don't want to knit. At all. I also didn't want to go to Knit Night. I wouldn't have gone yesterday if Em didn't need me to pick her up at the train station so she could come to Knit Night, too.

Oh, did I mention that? Em is coming to my knitting group now, since I taught her how to crochet. Everyone loves her (which is not surprising, because she's hella charming).

Anyway, I'll keep you all posted on whether the SAD light continues to elevate my mood or not.

Still In The Dark

This time of year is really hard for me. It's so dark when I leave for work in the morning, and then I'm inside my lab all day, and then I come home and all I want to do is sleep. It's the hardest thing in the world for me to stay awake until a decent bedtime. Scott's been making fun of me for it. I know it's all in good fun and that he loves me, but I don't think he realizes how hard this is for me this year. I don't think he understands how powerful the urge to sleep actually is. And I think a large portion of that is the Abilify.

I want to try something else, but at the same time, I've never felt more calm and less anxious than I have while I've been on the Abilify. Scott definitely doesn't want me to try something else. I think switching meds around is more stressful for him than it is for me. He's the one that has to deal with any weird changes in my mood (not that I'm not experiencing it, but it's rougher on him for some reason than on me...it's almost like I can internalize what I'm feeling and make it not affect me as much, even though it's readily apparent to him what I'm feeling...it makes sense in my head).

I pry myself out of bed in the morning (after hitting snooze for half an hour), go to work, walk around in a haze all day, come home, and then I have to find something to fill my time until I can actually go to bed. Trust me, if I went to sleep right when I got home I'd easily sleep until morning. It's hard enough to stay awake after getting off of work at a normal time, but when I get off of work early and have time to take a nap before dinner...sigh. And the sad thing is, right after dinner I just want to get back in bed.

I'm taking my meds as faithfully as I can (I do forget a pill now and again, but I try to keep that from happening as much as possible). I have a SAD light, but I keep forgetting to use it, which makes me feel terrible for complaining when I'm not doing everything in my power to keep this depression at bay.

I'm sitting here, at work, at my desk, and fighting to stay awake. Maybe I'll head over to the gas station and grab a soda...

He Fell! It Was Awful!

Here I am, sitting at my desk at work, bored out of my skull because I finished all of my work two hours ago but have to stay until my service technician is done with the preventative maintenance on my mercury analyzer. Hooray.

So, I'll tell you a story. It's a sad story. You've been warned.

On Sunday Scott fell down our front stairs when he slipped on the ice. It was on the exact same spot where I slipped on the ice three weeks ago.

Now, I got off easy when I fell. All I got was some giant bruising (and a few moments of tear-inducing pain when it first happened). Scott, however, twisted his already injured back.

He can barely move to get from the bed to the couch and back.

I've been doing all I can for him, but, unfortunately, all that entails is getting him food, drinks, meds, and ice packs. I'm grateful he can at least crawl up the stairs to use the bathroom by himself... But there's not much else I can do except sit with him and feel sad on his behalf.

Sad, sad day.

Happy 2013!

I suppose it's about time for a New Year post.

This past year has been pretty good. I mean, things haven't been perfect, that's for damn sure. But do you know how much worse things could really have been?

This year I learned to spin and bought a spinning wheel. I started my first lace project. I made a ton of really pretty stitch markers. I learned to wash and dye raw wool. I made my friend a beautiful blessing gown.

In January, I got burned with concentrated acid.

We put in new hardwood floors, got new carpet, and got new appliances. We put new blinds in all the windows of the house.

Scott and I had our fifth anniversary.

I switched from Risperdal to Abilify. I thought about whether this was a good thing or a bad thing.

And...that's about it. And at the same time, there's much more that I didn't write about, because this has apparently been the year of unmotivation (to blog).

My only regret for this year is that Scott's back has only gotten worse, and he's been put on stronger and stronger pain medication as his body gets used to what he's taking. He's trying very hard not to let it control his life, but it's hard some days when he can't even get out of bed because the pain is too bad. He did manage to go skiing last weekend (though he paid for that for the next two days...) and tries to go shooting as much as he can, and we try to take Buster on walks more often, but staying active is harder than you'd think when you're living with back pain.

Overall, though, this has been a good year. I had a lot of good times with my friends and family that I will never forget.

So what do I want for 2013? Not a damn thing (except the back pain thing really needs to go away). I'm not making any resolutions, because I'm just going to break them and then beat myself up about it. I'm just going to try to be the best I can and that's all anyone can ask of me, including myself.

Happy New Year, everyone! Since tonight's Friday night, I'll make a toast to 2013 with some sour apple schnapps, and go to bed early. Because I can.

Night Christmas

This year Em and Jorg wanted to spend Christmas morning with Jason, so we decided to get the whole family together that night for Night Christmas. It's the same as Christmas Morning except we ate tacos and then opened presents at night.

It was SO MUCH FUN!

Scott and I got a present or two for each person from their Amazon wishlists, and then I made a handmade something for each person as well. For Mim I made a scarf and mittens (first time I've ever made mittens!) made from my handspun. For Scott I made a beanie, and for Isaac a greyish blue scarf. For Kwiddens I made this awesome navy blue chunky scarf, and for Nyah I made a little pink ruffle purse (filled with gummi bears, of course). For Em, since she is learning to crochet, I spun some red and black yarn (her favorite colors). I didn't try anything super fancy, since I had to make ALL THE THINGS, and I didn't start until the end of November (oops), but maybe next year I'll try something more commensurate with my skill level.

Scott, of course, got me about a zillion things off of my wishlist per tradition (tons of CDs, a few books, season one of Being Human (with the hottest actor I know of)(I mean, yum, right?), a coaster and keyring with the periodic table on them, another row counter for knitting, and some earrings). Mim got me a half-pound of the most delicious rosy pink merino silk to spin. Em is making me a hat and scarf. Kwiddens got me some CDs and a POUND York...it's huge. I have no idea how I'm going to eat it. I think that's about everything...I may have forgotten a thing or two (I did make out like a bandit this Christmas, I have to say).

I'm really lucky that I enjoy spending holiday time with my family. I know a lot of people don't get along well with their family members and it makes holidays stressful, but with our group we just relax and hang out, doing pretty much whatever we want to. Want to watch a movie? Cool! Want to play a game? Cool! Want to sit and do nothing? Also cool! Seriously, with our family, anything goes because we're so relaxed like that.

Back before the divorce, Christmas (and basically all other holidays) was so stressful. Everything had to be scheduled. Everything had to be perfect. Everything, everything, everything. Jason was always grumpy, even when we went to a lot of trouble to think of the perfect gifts for him. He would still just sit in the corner with a scowl on his face and throw a fit when we wanted him to open his gifts from all of us. I talked to Emilee about it, and apparently that's all he did this Christmas, too. I miss him sometimes, and sometimes I wish we had a better relationship, but I remember things like this and realize that our family gatherings are happier and more loving now, and that's about the best consequence of a divorce situation I can imagine.

Text Time 27

Starring Kwiddens, grammar, and spelling. Enjoy.

Kwiddens: Sigh. "Sea urchant".
Me: Ugh.

Kwiddens: Kill me. "Congratulations to those who one." That was a WORK e-mail.
Me: So unprofessional.
Kwiddens: Seriously. They need to hire me as an editor so they don't look like idiots.

Kwiddens: I'm so glad we know how to spell and use proper grammar. People constantly amaze me. In a bad way.
Me: Riiiiiight? What triggered this gladness?
Kwiddens: Your use of a comma in "Me, too."
Me: Yay!
Kwiddens: At work I listen to people misuse punctuation constantly.
Me: Yuck.
Kwiddens: For real right now.

Me: It bugs me to no end that people say "samwich" instead of "sandwich".
Kwiddens: Ugh, seriously. Or "all of the sudden".
Me: That, too.
Kwiddens: Or ending sentences with "at". That one makes my job hard. The program doesn't like it because it doesn't make sense.

Kwiddens: "All in favor say IIIIIIII!" Facepalm.
Me: Oh hell.
Kwiddens: The English language is writhing on the floor.

Things I Usually Write About

I've been going over excuses in my head for not writing lately...for quite a while, actually...but none of them seem good enough for you all, my wonderful readers (all umm...four?...of you).

What are the things I usually talk about?

Buster: He was naughty twice yesterday and got sent downstairs as punishment. Eating grass while standing in the flower bed where he KNOWS he's not allowed, and later not coming when called while there was someone at the door (we have a SIGN that says No Soliciting, and I KNOW you can read because you were trying to sell newspapers, for heaven's sake). We've gotten too lax with him. He used to be so well-behaved, and technically he still is compared to all the other dogs but if you knew him as well as we do you'd notice a difference, too. Naughty, naughty, naughty.

Scott's back: Well, we've both given up and not given up. We're resigned to our fate at this point, but we're still doing something about all of it. Scott is going to a pain clinic on a regular basis, and a chiropractor when we can afford it, and we're just trying to keep him as active as he can stand. He even wants to try skiing this winter, but we need some snow first...

Yarning: I've been knitting, spinning, and crocheting a TON so far this month, mainly to get all the Christmas presents I want to do done. I'm not doing anything super fancy, but I've got something in the works for Em, Jorg, Mim, and Kwiddens. I'm thinking that if I have time I can make something smallish for Scott and Isaac, too. The problem is, Scott doesn't want anything and Isaac is really too picky about hats, so I don't know what to make. I have no idea what to make Nyah. I don't even know if she would appreciate something at this age. Perhaps a little pink ruffly purse? But I haven't finished any of it. There are still ends to weave in and everything needs to be bathed and blocked before I can take pictures and wrap it all up.

Holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc.): Thanksgiving went off pretty well. Other than a personal matter, everything was totally smooth and stress-free. People were fed and they were happy about it, and nobody got food poisoning. I cooked everything except the mashed potatoes all by myself. Li made the mashed potatoes (and they were heavenly, of course). After the meal we pretty much spent the rest of the weekend eating junk and playing Starcraft 2, and I surprised myself and didn't suck at games as much as I thought I would. As for Christmas, this year we're going to do Night Christmas. That way Em and Jorg can spend Christmas morning with Jason, Mim can hang with me all day and help me cook Christmas dinner, and Kwiddens, Isaac, and Nyah can spend the morning with Nyah's grandparents, and then we can all get together at our house in the evening for dinner and presents.

Work: Eh. It's going. I feel like I've mentally checked out a little, and I feel bad about that, and am trying to muster a bit more enthusiasm, but I'm just tired all the time, and there is an issue I won't go into here that is trying to get resolved, and if it doesn't get resolved to my satisfaction, I'm going to find myself looking for a new job. It would break my heart to leave this company, because it really is a sweet gig, but this issue is...big. Very big. If you're dying of curiosity PM me and I'll talk about it with you on an individual basis, but the blog is not the place for it.

The House: We got the Home Depot card paid off from the fiasco back in May, and that was a huge load off of our minds because let me tell you, spending that much and trying to pay it off in six months to avoid interest will KILL you. Trust me, I know. Anyway. Once we paid it off...we put more on it. We were trying to clean up after Halloween and get the garage cleaned out so one of us could park in there, and getting so frustrated because we have so much crap, and we decided we wanted a shed. So we drove over to Home Depot and bought one. We LOVE it. And of course I don't have a picture, because I'm lazy and tired all the time and who has motivation to take pictures of inanimate objects, anyway? But all of our extra seasonal stuff fits out there, plus the lawnmower, plus lots of room for more stuff as we decide what to put in there.

A few other random thoughts:

I just burned my tongue on hot cocoa. OUCH.

I should have brought a book or a project to work today.

And lastly, I need some lunch but nothing sounds good.